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Too many books - too much fanfiction - too little time

Zone One - Colson Whitehead
Do you know the kind of book where you would rather, instead of continuing to read, pick up a rusty, dull knife, and stab it in your heart again and again? Yes? yeah me too. No? Well, keep reading then..

This is without a doubt the most boring book ever written. Oh, there’s a book about watching paint dry? Trust me, I would rather read about specific details of watching paint dry every day for the rest of my life then read this book again..
I do not even understand what this is? Why the fuck did the world need this book?

It’s a guy walking around thinking about how Zombies have taken over the world, but nothing happens! Yes, he shoots a “skel” here and there, and he thinks back to a girl he met, and hey, look, there’s a bridge.

What the fuck is the point of this book?

Do you also know the books where your eyes see the actual words, but they just don’t register at all? I mean, yes my eyes read the book, but in my mind I was planning dinner or thinking about work. Honestly. ZzzzZZzz..

The writing makes no sense at all either. It’s like a guy from the “hood” trying to speak (or think!) how he thinks “posh” people speak.

“No picnickers idled on their blankets, no one goldbricked on the benches, and nary a Frisbee arched through the sky..”

“nary a Frisbee”? Really? This is how the dude thinks? Uh huh.. At other times he thinks about running out of condoms… Sadly, he didn’t think “oh no, I have nary a condom left” though.. I would have given a star just for that.. Just sayin..


The only good thing about this book is the dude’s name which is “Mark Spitz”..

The sad thing about the dude’s name is that there was a very, very long chapter about how he got that specific name…

And even though I ‘read’ it - I still don’t know how he got it..

I guess my mind blanked out after 10% to save itself..

-1 star.